Recently, I had to attend and was pall bearer at the funeral for the parent of a friend. We were close and was a very sad occasion. Added to that, it was a Catholic service. For those who have never had to endure one, a Catholic funeral almost makes you envy the dead person.

In the funeral procession from the church to the cemetery I called my friend Bismo. We have long had a connection of Blues music and "The Blues Brothers. I asked him to enter into the same agreement John Belushi and Danny Ackroyd made to each other that which ever one survived the other would play The Ventures "2,000 Pound Bee" at the funeral. We agreed.

Then, I kept thinking. I do not want my funeral to be a sob fest. Even if I were to die tomorrow in some freakish accident, I would only want my friends to gather to remember me, tell stories about me, sing and laugh. To that end, I am currently working on my own "Funeral Burn". The first song will be Paul McCartney's "Dance Tonight". I like the irony of such an upbeat song at a funeral. I also have Parliment's "Give Up the Funk", J. Geils Band "Love Stinks" along with lots of Sinatra, blues, Al Yankovich, Alan Sherman....well, you get the idea.

I picture a keg set up next to the casket. In the casket I would by lying in repose dressed in jeans, Hawaiian shirt with my "Village Idiot" t-shirt underneath, a cigar clamped in my teeth and my Elvis shades on. I want something that, with a combined effect, would make my sisters just stand there shaking their heads and sighing.

While not a binding contract for my funeral, I would suggest to anyone who attends and finds anything different than this to simply stand up and start singing the theme to "The Muppett Show". You would have my eternal thanks.