Into the fray once more......

I actually got up the nerve to ask a girl out today. OK, so it took two days and someone yelling at me to finally motivate me, but I did it!

OK, so there is this very pretty young lady at work who caught my eye recently and through some investigating by a mutual friend I learned that she, while "having male friends", had no one serious in her life at the moment. This was a vast improvement over my last attempt.

So for the first day I mulled things over and slowly the anxiety began to creep up as I thought about actually asking her out. Then yesterday my investigative friend offered an opportunity. He and his wife invited me to have dinner at his house next Sunday evening. Perfect, I thought; a setting with a group of people and not as stressful for a first date as going out alone. This girl and I really don't know each other more than to pass each other around the office and maybe one or two simple chit chat like conversations. So, we starting at ground zero here.

That gave me all of today to let nervousness and anxiety ramp even higher. I fell back into my 14 year old frame of mind as I made a number of aborted attempts to walk up to her and start the ball rolling. I am surprised my sales director didn't say anything to me. He can look right down the aisle from his office to where I sit and I'm sure he would have noticed how many times I was out of my seat during the day. Bright side is that I got plenty of exercise doing laps around the sales floor.

My investigative friend claims it was only to get me to simply strike up an conversation and that he didn't expect me to actually come out and ask her but he gave me some paperwork to deliver to her "on my way back to my desk". wink - wink I started doing laps again, this time with the paperwork in my hands.

Finally, as I stood next to my desk doing an impersonation of Cameron from "Ferris Bueller's Day Off"....

"I'll go..I'll go..I'll go. No."

....my supervisor came walking by.

I turned to her and said, "Call me a wimp!"

"You're a lousy little wimp!" she said with a mixture of bewilderment at the request and pure joy at calling me a lousy little wimp.

That was what I needed; someone other than the little voice inside my head telling me I was being ridiculous. Off I went. Right up to her and handed her the paperwork.

Dang! I hadn't been this close to her in a while. I was right, she is pretty.

I rattled off the bogus business reasons for my stopping by and without catching a breath ( as if I had any oxygen in my body at this point) I slid right into the invite. There was a momentary look of surprise on her face; sort of like when you open the prize at the bottom of a Cracker Jack and it some odd toy you've never seen before and you wonder, "What the hell is that?"

Game over, I thought.

Then she simply said, "Yes."

As we began to talk details of when and where, she remembered she did have something at that time. Undaunted, I offered that we could try some other time, maybe. There was no Cracker Jack look this time, and she dais "Sure".

So, while not completely a "yes" it is still not a "no". There is still some hope left. That was eight hours ago and I think the adrenalin has finally left my system.

More as this develops.

Yesterday was National Talk Like a Pirate Day and my throat still hurts. I made my way "Arrrghhhhh"-ing and "Aye-aye"-ing through the whole day. I even talked with customers on the telephone in the same gravely voice. Either they also knew it was National Talk Like a Pirate Day or they thought I was British!

Well, I've had my new van of a week and I think we have become friends. I have found just the right position for the seat. The air conditioner seems to reach just the right temperature a little faster and it handles easier and easier. I know it's more a matter of me getting more used to the vehicle but I have always felt cars have individual personalities.

Take my very first car, Harlan, for example. Yes, I name my cars. Harlan was much like I was at age 16; sporty, fast and messy. Oh, and energetic. This car was so energetic it actually jumped. I have been informed by my more mechanically inclined friends that a bad transmission made the car physically jump in place more than some metaphysical soul it might have had.

I still tend to believe Harlan had a personality.

My last van, The Bull, was moody; much like any ailing senior citizen. He performed better with praise. All he needed after 40 miles of driving was a nap; after which he would attack the highway like a geriatric racing for the dining hall on Salisbury Steak Night.

I have yet to name this car. I am waiting to see what personality emerges. I am also pondering "geeking my ride". This 1993 GMC Safari is all while. To my Trek fan mind it suspiciously resembles a shuttle craft. All that is missing is some lettering, hull numbers and a Starfleet logo on the back door.

My son will never want to ride in the same car with me again!

Last night I received a very dubious honor at a company party. This quarter's morale boosting theme has been Liberty High School. People brought in their graduation photos and they were plaster all around the buildings. Then the other day we received "school supplies; pens, pencils and rulers all emblazoned with the company logo. All of this culminating in last night's Sock Hop.

People showed up in 50's outfits. There were poodle skirts, capris, leather jackets and two Elvi. (That is the plural of Elvis, isn't it?) Class Superlatives were handed out. Best Dressed, Best Smile, Most Dependable. What a surprise it was when I won Class Clown. Actually, I won that category in all three buildings but they had to give one out to someone in each so I only won for my building.

I may not yet have the promotion I want, but I am being recognized for what I do best!

My son didn't come this weekend and the house seems extra quiet because of it. I know we can switch weekends and all that but I always look forward to our time together so much. I'm sure this will happen more and more as he get deeper into really being a teenager. I can only imagine what I'll be like after he's 18 and no longer "has to" visit.

I am currently mulling over auditioning for a local theater group's production of "Death of a Salesman". Daunting, I know, to choose something like Arthur Miller for a first time on the stage in a long time. I did do a reading theater a few years ago but that was with the script right in front of me. I honestly wonder if I could commit an entire two act play to memory when there are times I wonder why I walked from one room to the other or forget names of friends I've had for years. Can my 40-something brain actually do it?

Yes, Mr. Ego wants to try out for Willy Loman. I realize regional theater can be clique-ish and I've never worked with this particular troupe. I realize it's been 8 years since I was on a stage. I realize it's a big frickin' part. It would certainly be a test of any talent I might have.

Or might not have.

Auditions are next week; I'll let you know.

WB where are you!

I have gone into withdrawal since the local channel carrying WB programming moved their slate of shows to a sister station which is not carried by DirecTV. I have already missed out on the season premier of "Gilmore Girls" and am dreading missing out on another great season of "Smallville".

I am not taking this lying down. I have already called the company which owns the WB affiliate, the local television critic along with a station request, official complaint and email to customer service for DirecTV. I am on a mission.

OK, I know...."It's just a TV show". But both of the programs I'm missing out on are, in my humble opinion, some of the best writing being done on television today. On "Gilmore" the jokes, pop references and snappy dialogue fly off the screen like electrons. "Smallville" is a well crafted comic book based drama which holds its original material in high regard and pays homage to it in some of the most inspired and original ways.

Yes, I could wait for next season's DVD's. I could try to watch TV the old fashioned way, with an antenna. Or I could beg friends with cable which carries the station. Hopefully, I won't have to wait too long as the public relations person at the TV station says they are "in negotiation". With any luck this will be long before the repeat season starts.

Such is the life of a couch potato.

I just got back from doing something I haven't done in many months; walking up to the supermarket to do my shopping. I need a nap!

Actually, it wasn't that bad. It was just around 88 degrees and a light breeze which kept the sweat from happening, at least until the way home. My body isn't used to carrying the 5 pounds of groceries for the 2 miles and I was a bit damp when I got home.

I didn't realize how much I missed the walks. Last year, the last time I was without a vehicle, I did it out of necessity on a regular basis because I had to. I probably could have waited another day to get food but I wasn't about to shell out another $20 for a pizza. Now that I'm buying another car, I have to make the budget stretch.

Yes, I am getting another car right away. My friend Jim has offered me his old van on time payments. I should have him paid in full in a month and still be able to attend Vulkon in November. The best part is that I didn't go to family or friends to borrow the money. Yes, I am somewhat doing the same thing by paying Jim over time, but I didn't grovel to someone for the cash and struggle to pay them back. Needless to say, I'll be bugging management at work for that chance in incentive pay even more now!

The Bull is dead!

My van has finally given up the ghost and died. I was on my way home from work Thursday night and it simply gave out. The engine just stopped. I imagine it is now what is called seized. I was surprised there was no horrendous noise as metal ground to a halt. It simply stopped running and no longer turns over.

I was at a light on Green River Parkway; the new road I drooled over a few months ago. To add insult to injury this is a spot with the nearest telephone about a mile in either direction and my cell phone chose that particular moment to also give out. A fellow Liberty employee was kind enough to give me a ride to her house to call AAA.

The van now sits in repose outside my trailer. I have a option of buying my friend's van; if I can come up with the money. I'm making calls to friend and family to help out so I don't have to go too long without a vehicle. Again.

I can't complain too much as the van has held on since last winter and has given me 5 good years and many trips filled with good memories. If only it could have waited two more months.

My fingers are crossed that I might be working my way into my first paid vice over job. My friend Jason has become acquainted with a local horror author, Franklin E Wales. He has written a novel called "Booger". On his website Frank mentioned that would like to do an audio version of the book but had yet to find "a voice he could afford". This would be a perfect opportunity for me, trying to break into the business and for him, trying to get an audio book done inexpensively.

I got some advice from George Takei, as he's the only person I know who does this for a living. He tended to agree that using this as a "resume piece" was more important that the money. The money can come later.

Tell that to my bank book!

I am proud of my friendship with George and always hope that it doesn't sound like name dropping whenever I talk about him. After almost 20 years of knowing him I look on him as a friend and not just "Sulu". OK, so the geek in me loves it. I never would have imagined being in the position of conferring as a professional with someone I watched every day on television.

If I was in this friendship with him simply for monetary gain and vicarious notoriety I would have sold my videotape of the Jogging Practical Joke years ago. From the beginning, I guarded that tape because it was a personal moment between George and me.

On the same voice over train of thought, I am supposed to be going up to Orlando in the next few weeks on another lead for work. A friend of mine is teaching at The Dave School. As I was watching the AFI Tribute to George Lucas a pattern seemed to show itself. Coppola, Speilberg and others talked about working with Lucas on their student films when they were at USC.

.....student films?

.....STUDENT FILMS!

If it worked for these guys the same theory should work for me. I will offer my to work for these students making computer games and animations for film and TV, then when they hit the big time they go looking for the same voice over talent that helped get them started. The best part of this is I get my foot slightly in the door without having to leave the area.

Weekend Recap

Johnny and I did have a good weekend. More simply living together in the same house than going out and doing something special; which is just as important as the "fun times". He watched movies and played video games.

STAY AWAY FROM "TRANSPORTER 2"
This was such a let down from the original. Loaded with stupid Wylie Coyote stunts which went beyond reason and a story that took leaps of believability Evel Kenevel couldn't jump. The worst part was that they messed with some basics of the original story. Frank (Jason Statham) was in Europe for some reason which, like Rick from "Casablanca", was clouded in mystery but you knew he couldn't go back. Now, he's living in Miami as if nothing is wrong. The the French detective, Gianni (Alessandro Gassman) visits him like an old college buddy and ends up covering for him with the US Marshals. There was a wonderful cat and mouse game between the two of them were you always knew Gianni would have out him away if he could prove anything. Now, he's buddy, buddy with him, lying to federal officials and hacking into a police computer system like he's surfing ebay!

In the continuation of his "Romeo and Juliet" education we tried watching "West Side Story". I say "tried" because we were both put off by it and gave up on it. I'm sure when it first came out there was some punch to it, but we just could not get into it. The songs didn't seem as if they flowed naturally from the story. It was too much a stage presentation. Don;t get me wring, I love Fossee, but this one didn't ring true for me. "The King and I", "Sound of Music" and "Fiddler on the Roof all seems as if the music flows from what is happening in the story; that if it were natural for people to express themselves with song and a full symphony orchestra...that is what it would sound like.

Next visit should get back in the groove with the Leo DiCaprio version of "R&J". It felt good to know that his watching the first film with me had sparked enough with him that when they were talking about doing the play in class, he already had an idea what part he wanted to do, Mercutio. His teacher had mentioned it to my ex at the open house last week. This should be fun going through this with him this semester.

And he thought science fiction was the only reason he'd have to roll his eyes at his dad!

I sometimes wonder who that fool is fretting over his child as he travels a mere 60 miles on mass transit. Is it the same person who used to boast so much about making a round trip from Rhode Island to Texas on the bus at age 13? That can't be the same person calling his son on his cell phone every twenty minutes checking on his progress.

That person preened over the fact he had a four hour layover in the New York City Port Authority and made his connections by himself. This person has called his child more times than his ex. That cannot be the same person!

No, can't be!

Yup! That's me, alright! Of course, part of it is making sure I'm the one on schedule but there was something compulsive as I looked at my watch knowing that the Tri-Rail train should be pulling out of the station and that my son had instructions to call when it began to move. Still I could not stop the images of him arriving late at the station and having to wait, by himself, for another hour. I made the first call and found out there was a delay. We did the math and figured I was even a little early to meet him so we hung up with that in mind.

Then, of course, I'm sitting there in the parking lot waiting, having arrived 15 minutes early. I knew the delay time. There had not been a single commuter train accident the entire time I've lived in Florida.

I must have picked up the phone to call him at least 6 times.

No! I'll just sit back and listen to the radio and enjoy "my" music before he jumps in the car and changes the station. I almost start picking up and putting the phone down to the beat of the music.

Rational, damn it, be rational!

Faintly, off in the distance, I hear the train's horn blowing.

"Ah-ha! See, I was right. Exactly when I said it would arrive. No problem-o!"

Yes, believe it or not....same guy!

OK, so I feel a little guilty over my recent hurricane rant. The boobs on local TV news are still idiots but I do feels sorry for the people devastated by Katrina; especially for New Orleans. I love The Big Easy and hope they make it back from this as quickly as possible. Same thing goes for Mobile; my second favorite gulf city. It’s heartbreaking to see streets I was wandering just a few months ago looking like rivers. The barstool I used at Napoleon’s must now be floating through the French Quarter. Canal Street is now a real canal.

My prevailing thought is how damned lucky we were last year. For all the inconvenience of not having power and some of the damage which was done around here, at least I had a home standing. Only a small portion of buildings here were damaged not the wholesale destruction we’re seeing. To see the suffering going on there almost brings me to tears as I watch the news.

To watch society break down as quickly as it has is also frightening. I understand that you have to do anything necessary to eat and shelter yourself but to see the violence erupting as it has and plummeting the French Quarter into a “Lord of the Flies” situation is scary. While the destruction here last year was a drop in the bucket, people in this area drew closer and were more helpful, patient and understanding with everyone around them.

The whole mobilization problem really has me troubled. At first, I was siding with the government. Few civilians realize the logistics that go into mounting such an effort and one that was in such flux as it went from a simple hurricane recovery to the massive flooding seen in New Orleans. Now, after five days, it is bordering on the ridiculous and obscene that more has not been done. We had troops in Kuwait faster 11 years ago. I’m sure there will be Congressional Hearings on this in the future.

Not that it was planned, but I seem to be living through some of the same post-hurricane conditions vicariously as my air conditioning is still on the fritz; something about an $800 compressor. My landlord gave me two window units to help make it bearable inside my trailer. Still not the meat locker temperatures I prefer and one of the units sounds like an old Studabaker. Still, I’m looking forward to a great three-day weekend with The Boy.

My son, the smartass.

He lives in Broward County, which was basically ground zero for this hurricane. Being the concerned parent, I called him early this morning to check on how they had fared through the storm.

"So, do you have any power?" I asked.

"Well, yeah, we got power.....kinda" he says, without missing a beat.

"'Kinda'? What do you have a generator?"

"No, we have power. We just don't have a roof"

"NO ROOF?! What do you mean you don't have a roof?" I start thinking that his mother would have called me if something like that had happened.

"We lost our roof last night. No roof"

Then I started hearing giggles under his breath.

"Nice try, young padawan".

I am NEVER going to play poker with my son.

As for the Hurricane, it did come ashore as a category one which did some damage in the Miami and southern Broward counties. Here on the Treasure Coast we got rain. Big whoop! There were two deaths reported associated with the storm. These seemed more like a thinning of the herd as they were both from falling trees during the height of the storm. I'm sure St. Peter greeted both these people at the pearly gates and slapped them upside the head for dying for such a stupid reason.

This weekend I'll be spending cleaning. The air conditioner seems to be having a problem. Why does that mean I have to clean? I have a neat freak for a landlord. I will admit I'm not the world's tidiest person, but I do keep thing in order. There might be a slight disarray and I do tend to just drop clothes wherever they land in my bedroom. Almost a year ago when he raised a stink I had the park manager come over and look around. "Lived in" was her judgement. Still, the less he has to complain about the better.

"The sky is falling! The sky is falling!"

That is the sound of local television here in Florida any time a storm heads our way. Right now we are under a Hurricane Warning". This is stretching from Vero Beach, 40 miles north of me, to Miami. TROPICAL STORM Katrina is expected to make landfall in Broward County, 90 miles south of me. As it skates across the Bahamas, Katrina has winds of 45 miles per hour and is forecasted to hit the mainland as a category one storm.

To watch the local newscasts you would have thought Lucifer had just announced he was beginning the apocalypse and it was starting in Ft. Lauderdale.

"IT'S THE COUNTDOWN TO KATRINA!"

Give me a friggin' break!

These dolts on local TV are having a field day trying to stir up the masses. I will admit to doing more hurricane season preparedness than last year. I will also cop to a certain amount of nervousness which might be called delayed stress as I watched the skies darken and heard the words "hurricane" and "headed for Florida" in the same sentence again. But, I think of myself as being a reasonably rational person. These Abbot and Costello news anchors are the biggest bunch of loudmouthed clowns.

Hey, newsgoons! Here's a concept for you.....report the news. Your job is a simple as that. They make such a good show of sounding like our best friends who "aren't trying to scare you but just want you to be prepared". Well, you can do that by simply telling us were the storm is, how strong it is and where it's going. Please stop sending your reporters out in weather we wouldn't send our dogs. We know what rough water on the beach looks like; you've been playing last year's storm footage every time it clouds over. We don't need team reporting every time a tree limb falls.

Storm Team. Storm Trakcer. First Warning.

CLICK!

Ahhhhhhhh......There's Bogey on TCM. That's better.

If you're reading this, chances are you're a Star Trek fan. OK, let's qualify that as "a Star Trek fan of one sort or another". I just had proof over the past month that there are fans everywhere.

Friday was the end of a "period of mourning" over the passing of Jimmy Doohan. For the past 30 days I have been wearing a commbadge with a black mourning band. Regardless of where I was or what I was wearing it was pinned to my chest in honor of "Scotty". This is a tradition I started 11 years ago when the father of a friend of mine passed away and he was a fan. He was also a retired police officer. The marrying of the tradition of a mourning badge and Trek seemed a natural way of showing respect for the man. His son thought it was the most moving gesture he had ever seen. The last time I wore one was when De Kelley passed away.

I was surprised by the number of people who not only identified that I was wearing a Star Trek item but identified exactly why I was wearing it as I was. The reactions ranged from "Oh, that such a nice thing to do" and comforting me as if I'd lost a family member to a wide range of Trek references. None of the comments were derogatory. While some comments did make a joke or two, "If I hit this and said, 'Beam me up', would you disappear?", none of them were of the making-fun-of-the-Star-Trek-geek variety.

It was a welcome change from the usual "Fan Bashing" which has followed me most of my life. From the days of being pelting with rocks and food in the schoolyard for wearing the blue sciences uniform/windbreaker sold by Ertl. No longer will I see the geekiest person in a TV sitcom being portrayed wearing Spock ears whereever he goes.

We're here....
We're Fans....
Get used to it!!!!

I came dangerously close to embarrassing myself at work today. Turns out the woman I had my eyes on at work has a lovely little collection of diamonds sitting on her left hand.

And when I say close....I mean close. She was also there working. We had made our usual eye contact. My adrenalin was racing and my palms were cold and clammy. I had an opening line all ready, just about had enough nerve built up and was ready to walk over and open my big mouth when a moment of indecision came into my mind. I asked my "sponsor" friend her opinion of what I was going to say and I'm so glad I did.

"She has a boyfriend, you know."

The rushing sound of blood returning to my brain was almost deafening. My blood pressure returned to normal and the realization of how big a boob I could have made of myself turned a knot of nausea in my stomach. Proving herself still a good friend, my sponsor came back a few minutes later with the personals section of the paper highlighted with promising prospects including one woman describing herself as "an ugly crow" looking for someone "willing to take a chance".

I'll keep taking my chances by playing lotto, thank you.

But at least I learned something over the past few days. That all it takes is one good looking woman to turn an otherwise reasonable adult into a babbling, drooling idiot with clammy hands and a stutter.

And here's to the next one in line!

Today is my 2nd Birthday!

It was two years ago today I had my gastric bypass surgery. Two years and two hundred and thirty-some-odd pounds ago. It's amazing as I look back over the past two years and compare where I was before walking into the hospital wondering if I was doing the right things and where I am physically today. Everything about my life was changed with the slice if the surgeon's scalpel.

And I couldn't be happier!

OK, maybe a little happier when I get closer to my final goal weight.

So, Happy Birthday to me, anyway!

It's been about two years since the last time I tried this but I am getting my nerve up at ask a woman for a date. And I'm right back in some of my old habits and trepidations. If you read some of the first entries in this blog you'll see my last attempt at this and I'm just as nervous this time around. But for different reasons.

This is a co-worker who I have only seen in passing. We have made eye contact a few times and might have possibly exchanged an audible "Hello" at each other. That is the extent of our contact with each other. At least the last time, I had some sort of contact with the girl. This one is completely out of the blue.

I did ask some questions of a friend who works with her and got two very important answers. She's very intelligent and a single mom. The operative word there is SINGLE! And, yes, she's very pretty.

But to simply walk up to a total stranger and say "Hello, you don't know me, but I was wondering if you would like to have lunch with me" sounds as if it smacks of "stalker". I asked a female friend of mine and she says that really isn't the case. I don;t know how much better those words of encouragement really worked.

You have to understand that I really have not been "out there" much in my life. I dated in high school and most of those came from a close knit circle of friends. I met my first wife when I was 19 and had known my second wife since about the same time. I never really dated as an adult. This is very foreign to me.

There was one time when I actually "picked someone up" and that was back in high school. I was working as a score keeper at a basketball game and got introduced to a girl named Roxanne. I asked for her number and actually got it. We dated for almost a year. That was the only time I ever went on a "cold call". And it has me petrified.

When I was talking with my female friend about this earlier this evening I even stuttered. My "friend" is going to have fun simply watching me squirm my way through my anxiety. I don't know how soon I'll be able to let my testicles grow to a normal size and actually approach this woman but I'll keep you posted.

Wish me luck.......I think I'll need it.

Anyone who knows me knows I'm unapologetically a couch potato. SO here's some recent thoughts on TV I've been watching.

My son got me into watching "House" and, at first, I thanked him. Hugh Laurie is the biggest reason to watch this show. House is a well written character loaded with flaws and a sarcasm that will not quit. However, the entire premise is beginning to wear on me. It is soooooooo repetitive week after week after week. Someone gets mysteriously sick, they try a treatment which almost kills the person, the huddle, House insults the other doctors, they find the cure and all is well. YAWN! There has got to be more than one way of telling these stories.

"Stranded with Cash Peters" is an offering on the Travel Channel which I gave three weeks to redeem itself and it never did. Peters is a BBC, NPR radio host and author with cheekiness that makes you want to vomit. He gets "stranded" somewhere different each week and has to weasel his way into free food and lodging while learning something new about a culture or place which he has never visited before. I guess it's his hook, but he seems to have utter disdain and for everywhere he goes. He ridicules everyone and their beliefs. He jokes about his surroundings and cultures which have been around much longer than his fifteen minutes of fame. I tried really, really hard to enjoy this show and to get the joke but Peters wore me down each and every show. I kept watching and waiting for one of the locals to deck him and kick him out of town. Give me a good Michael Palin travel program any day. He will make a joke and be witty while still having respect for the lives upon which he intrudes.

"Over There" is pretty good. While it may be trying to shock for shock value, the fact that Bochco is shocking us about Iraq might be just what this country needs. There are some with their heads in the sand about this war and this show brings home just how difficult things are there. Maybe if more people were exposed to the realities of the situation they might reassess why we are there in the first place and if the lives lost are worth the price.

I'm catching up on "Lost" and "Rescue Me' thanks to TiVo. "Lost" has certainly kept my interest with its interwoven story lines and flashbacks. "Rescue Me" may well be one of the best dramas on television. Dennis Leary is magnificent and the show consistently delivers superior acting and writing.

But NOTHING beats "Battlestar Galactica" for the best drama on television. (Well, at least while "The West Wing" is between seasons!) Forget that it's science fiction and throw out the original. Top notch acting. Writers who are not afraid to take chances. This show ROCKS!

Paramount continues to show they have no idea what Trek fans want. They have just announced a deal to produce a Trek themed phone. This phone will allow you to download Trek games and ring tones and will come with themed face plates.

What we want is a freakin' cell phone that looks like an original series communicator. They would make a mint as every geek and their brother would walk over each other to get one. The technology has been there for a long time. When they finally get a deal set with a provider all they can come up with is face plates and ring tones; those are already out there and for lots cheaper than Paramount is going to rip us off for. These are the same marketing idiots that think we want to buy full sized cardboard cut outs of Kirk, Spock and Seven of Nine.

No, damn it, no!

We want a quality uniform that actually bears resemblance to what is worn on the shows. We want tie-ins we can use. Bring back the Enterprise-A blanket and the bathroom towel set; throw out the unending parade of plate series and polystyrene statues.

My son has no idea just how much trouble he is in for this year. He just completed his first day as a high school freshman. I called him to check on his classes for the year and to see how the day went. He has the usual class load with the added surprise of ROTC. This is probably due to his brother's influence; we'll see how that turns out during the semester.

Then he revealed the goldmine to me; in his English class he is going to be getting into Shakespeare's "Romeo and Juliet". This is my all time favorite Shapeskperean play. The Zefarelli version is one of my favorite films. I even enjoyed the Leo DiCaprio version. And now, my son is going to be studying it!

I'm already making plans. We'll watch both of those version and "West Side Story" as well. We'll read it together. I'm sure he'll be sick of me in no time!

Long before I had a son I can remember a conversation I had with a friend of mine about what I was going to share with a child and how I was going to connect. I was concerned because I was never really into sports. I was never going to be the Dad who taught a kind how to play baseball or take him to games and teach him all the intricacies of the game. I like to watch football for the spectacle but could never get into the strategy or statistics. Luckily, my son loves TV and movies like I do and we connect on that. Now I will be able to open up another world to him through Shakespeare.

And I was worried.

God, help me, it's official; I'm a GEEK!

I was just looking at my new cell phone; a Nokia 3120 and it somehow felt familiar. I had something in my hand this same size, shape and weight before.

It was from somewhere long before cell phones. What was it? Then it hit me.....

A Star Trek original series hand phaser.

There should really be a wing at Betty Ford for us.